So you’re searching for a partner with whom to start your brand new poly life with, or maybe you’re looking to expand your already amazing polycule. Either way, going the online route is a great choice as it gives you instant access to the poly community and allows you to communicate your needs directly, something that’s not always easy to do in our monogamous-oriented society. Like any online dating attempt, however, your chance at success depends on a number of key factors, profile quality being one of them.
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Tips for Creating a Stellar Poly Dating Profile
Be Upfront
When I began my online exploration into the world of poly dating, I was a little shocked by the number of undercover poly guys I found. If not for the box checked Non-Monogamous, I would never have guessed their openness to engaging in multiple relationships. I can understand that it might feel a bit scary to put yourself out there so brazenly, but what have you got to lose? Declare your poly status directly on your profile! It will make you seem much more confident and sure of your choices, which we all know is a lot sexier than being a fence-sitter.
Be Specific
Once you’ve opened the door with a bold statement about your poly status, go ahead and describe exactly what you’re looking for and what you have to offer. Are you new to the poly dating scene? Do you have any other partners? Are you looking for something casual or more serious? How much time can you realistically devote to a new person in your life? While some things can be revealed through private messaging, it’s much more useful to be as transparent as possible right off the top. Why waste everybody’s time when you can so clearly make your desires known?
Be Thorough
Dating sites offer lots of opportunities to reveal who you are and what you’re looking for, so why not take advantage of that? Fill out your profile completely! It’s such a disappointment to click on what seems like a promising match only to discover a half-assed description and a single, sad profile pic. Try to avoid clichéd statements like “I’m an easy going guy” or “I’m an adventurer.” Pretty much every guy on dating sites thinks that he falls into one of those two categories. If you really must classify yourself, be sure to give examples of why you see yourself that way, otherwise it’s just an empty statement. These are important things to keep in mind when creating any type of dating profile, but especially a poly one. You really want to show the world that you know who you are and that you’re a good communicator.
Be Mindful of Everyone’s Privacy
In the course of being so thorough and transparent, just be sure not to reveal things about your other partners unless you have permission to do so. It’s okay to mention specific things about your poly dynamic, but don’t out anyone by posting their picture or mentioning identifying details about them. Also be considerate of the people you end up connecting with online and don’t share personal things about them with your existing partners unless you’ve been given the all clear. Respect and consent are so crucial in the search for a poly connection.
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