Tips & Advice

4 Mistakes You’re Making in Your Online Dating Profile

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Online dating is not a perfect science. There’s ups and downs, and much of it is out of our control. But what you can control is the way your dating profile presents itself to women.

We all want to maximize our online dating profile for best results. Here are four common errors guys make.

4 Common Dating Profile Mistakes

1. You’re Not Telling It Like It Is

Women value honesty. It’s one of the most important attributes. Your honesty makes it easier for us to connect with you.

We understand that there are weak spots that you’d rather leave out or gloss over or lie about. But if you think disguising something or lying about it will improve your chances with us, you’re wrong. We would rather you be honest about a so-called negative attribute or actual weak spots in your story. It’s brave and makes you human.

2. You’re Sharing TOO Much Private Information with the Public

On the other hand, there is such a thing as being TOO honest. You want to tell the truth about stuff, but there’s stuff that should wait until you’ve been dating a while to confess. Don’t share information that is none of our business—that’s the rule when trying to figure out what to be honest about and what to leave out.

If you’re spilling your deepest secrets, or private information that implicates other people in your life, it’s a clear signal to us that you don’t have a concept of boundaries or the ability to be discreet.

In all dating, but especially polyamorous dating, we need to know we can trust you. How well you juggle the confidential aspects of your relationships with one or more other women is essential to whether or not we think you will be discreet and respect our privacy.

3. You’re Not Approachable

Lots of poly profiles read like job applications, feel cold and clipped, or like an exercise in getting dressed to impress. Putting your best foot forward with no personality might make you inaccessible.

You might think we are all impressed by success stories, shiny cars, and polished muscles, then wonder why the short guy who mops the hospital has more girlfriends than you.

Women connect with real people and see success in a wide variety of ways. You want to share your strengths and triumphs to impress us, we get that. But don’t brag and don’t belittle the ordinary or other people. If we don’t think we can live up to your expectations or profile, we won’t message you.

4. You’re Leaving too Many Blanks

Maybe you’re a bare bones kind of guy, or maybe you don’t see the need to answer everything you’re being asked. That’s up to you, of course, but if it looks like you just can’t be bothered to fill out your profile, you’re going to get a lot fewer responses.

Your online dating profile is your first point of contact with women. More women will engage with it than will message or meet you. You want to take advantage of every opportunity to introduce yourself.

The more you fill out, the more she can assess whether you’re a potential match. Statistics are clear: men and women who fill out the most information get the most messages.

What dating profile tips can you share? What attracts you to a profile?

Tell us what you think!

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