Many people have kinky tastes. The sexual masochist enjoys various levels of humiliation, degradation, and physical pain.
In sadomasochism, the S&M part of BDSM, sadism is the enjoyment of inflicting pain or punishment, and masochism is the enjoyment of receiving pain or punishment.
A masochist may enjoy many pain kinks, or they may have a strong preference for only one masochism fetish. They may prefer a masochistic lifestyle, sometimes extending to their psychological profile in work and friendships as well as the bedroom. Many masochists also enjoy sadism kinks—fetishes that are about inflicting pain and punishment, at different times or in the same session.
If you are turned on by sadomasochism, or dating a lover who is, you might wonder about the range of BDSM and pain kinks.
10 Masochist Kinks and Fetishes
1. Impact Play
Spanking is a popular and common pain kink, so widespread it is almost vanilla. Most lovers enjoy a little wallop or swat time to time.
Spanking feels good to many and is a playful manifestation of the power exchange. And it gets kinkier when someone is more into it or desires more intensity.
When spanking has more ritual and ceremony, special implements like paddles or canes, and happens more frequently or in longer durations, it would qualify as fetish.
2. Bondage and Discipline
Classic bondage and discipline might be the most common kink for masochists. Submitting to their dominant and being restrained or tied up is very pleasurable for a masochist looking to give up control.
BDSM and bondage is a vast umbrella of unique kinks. Some masochists prefer to be restrained with beautiful rope arts like shibari while others prefer chains and hardware, handcuffs, blindfolds, or leather cuffs.
3. Sissy Boy or Sissification
An increasingly popular humiliation tactic of femdom is the sissy boy or sissification kink. Sometimes this kink is called forced feminization.
A male sub derives pleasure from being emasculated, forced to wear women’s lingerie or makeup, with mockery of his masculinity in general or penis, with pegging being a popular finale to a session.
4. Pay Pigs
Findom or financial domination is a controversial domination and submission kink that is unusual in that often the participants do not even meet. It is often non-sexual, even though the players may derive sexual pleasure from the psychology of it.
Financial domination can be an entirely virtual experience where a femdom humiliates her “human ATM machines” or pay pigs by accepting their money. Pay pigs often work to give the fruits of their labors to someone they see as more deserving.
5. Nipple and Breast Torture
Intense breast or nipple play can feel overwhelming and painful. And wonderful!
Nipple clamps are extremely popular, but you can use ropes to tightly bind breasts, or you can bite or slap. Clothespins, piercings, you name it.
6. Forced Orgasms
The pinnacle of pleasure in sex for many is the orgasm, when sweet release or relief takes place after the buildup of tension. Our bodies are exquisitely sensitive before and after orgasm. A forced orgasm when the body’s nerves are spent is exhausting and painful.
Giving up control over your orgasm to a dom or domme is an exercise in pain and passion! Some extreme bondage sessions involve binding a female masochist with rope and directing a powerful vibrating wand against her clitoris, so she experiences forced orgasms. That’s just one way to play!
7. Blood Play or Blood Sports
We seldom discuss blood sports or related extreme kinks like cutting and knife play, because they aren’t as common as milder kinks and because they are disturbing to some or taboo because of safety concerns including STIs and physical harm. But some masochists desire very extreme kinks that culminate in the release of blood.
8. Degradation Kink
Most masochists enjoy some form of degradation, from verbal degradation like, “you’re such a slut” to physical acts like choking, slapping, and pushing.
Some folks have a thing for amputees. And some want to BE one. Apotemnophila is the desire to be missing a limb. Some go as far as having surgery to remove a limb or cutting it off themselves.
Do not try this at home or anywhere elese—it is very dangerous and life threatening, not to mention the long-term consequences. There is a lot of controversy over whether this is masochism or a mapping issue of the body inside of the brain.
10. Genital Torture
Cock and ball torture (CBT) or pussy torture are types of pain play in many masochist’s sexual repertoire. It’s just a matter of degree. From vanilla to hardcore kink lovers, they explore various sensations and push the intensity of biting, sucking, pinching, squeezing, spreading.
Masochists may practice with clamps, weights, electrostimulation, piercing, extreme penetration, and crushing.
Why Do Masochists Enjoy Pain Play and Punishment?
This psychology and sexuality of masochism and pain kink has been analyzed and theorized endlessly by various experts, from sex therapists to neurosurgeons. There are various theories and ideas about why some people enjoy pain and punishment.
Theories on masochism include the supposed submissive nature of women, the desire for relief from responsibility and authority, and taking control of painful experiences and turning them into pleasure. Ritualization of experienced trauma, social conditioning, chemical imbalance, and mental illness are also cited.
Other pain kink theories attribute imprinting of pleasure at the same time as painful experiences, acceptance of the natural duality and presence of pain and pleasure in the world, and even self-hatred. Also discusses are the the biochemistry of endorphins or the fact that pain and pleasure codes are closely related in our brain.
Whatever the merits or lack of merits of these various masochism theories and arguments, there is no one-size-fits-all explanation for masochists or pain kink. Nor do all masochists share the same psychological or sexual profile. Individual masochists do not all enjoy “any” kind of pain or punishment fetish—one may enjoy spanking or breast torture, but not derive enjoyment from cuckolding or small penis humiliation.
Do you enjoy any of these kinks or fetishes? Do you consider yourself a masochist? Please share!