Cuckold 101: All About Cuckolding

Millions are searching Google for the cuckolding kink, cuckold lifestyle, and cuckold relationships.

The word “cuckold” refers to a man whose wife is cheating on him behind his back. The basic idea has turned into a hugely popular fetish and lifestyle.

What Is Cuckolding?

The cuckolding kink or cuckold lifestyle is a non-monogamous fetish where men get turned on by their wife or girlfriend having sex with another man.

The kink can be very basic and center around the thrill of the idea of her having sex with another guy. For most, there is a more complex psychology and arousal, whether as a lifestyle choice or a fantasy played out for a night.

Cuckolding is a consensual kink and a female-led, non-monogamous relationship. Usually she takes other partners for sex, and he is faithful to her. There is a lot of overlap with domination, submission, humiliation and degradation forms of BDSM.

Cuckolding implies some level of humiliation most of the time because the old-fashioned meaning involves that aspect. Consensual cuckolding of course means that the male partner knows his girlfriend or wife is fucking other dudes, not running around with him none the wiser.

But the humiliation aspect is a key component of the arousal for most couples, and the fantasy often revolves around the idea that he can’t satisfy her on his own, so she needs more.

Her other lovers are frequently perceived as being more virile, more well-endowed, more attractive, wealthier, etc. Sometimes the turn on is also simply that she has such an intense libido that she needs more sex and more variety.

Read: One-Sided Open Relationships: Can it Work?

Cuckolding is one of the most requested kinks and kinds of porn today. It is an incredibly popular fantasy. While the term “cuckold” historically refers to the male being cuckolded, and the kink is delicious in part because of the taboo of female sexuality and dominance, cuckolding can involve any genders in any of the roles.

Cuckold Terms

In the cuckolding kink or lifestyle, you’ll hear fetish terminology. These are the main cuckold terms.


“Cuckold” is the humiliated one whose partner is having sex with other lovers.

There were two definitions for cuckold of old—one was “the husband of an adulteress” and the second was a man who was mocked and insulted. These have combined in the cuckold fetish to denote the one who receives excitement from the erotic humiliation of his wife or lover having sex with other men.


The cuckoldress is the wife who is taking other lovers.


The bull is the man who sleeps with the cuckoldress. His role is her sexual satisfaction, and sometimes he is more directly involved with the erotic humiliation of the cuckold.

Read: Tips for Sex with Another Man’s Wife


A cuckquean is a female cuckold. Many women find the cuckolding kink as arousing as men do, from the submissive role rather than the cuckoldress role.

Why Do Men Like Cuckolding?

There are a few reasons why cuckolding is such a turn on for many men.

The idea of your lover with another man, or watching her getting banged by another guy, is insanely hot. There is a steamy blend of biology and psychology at play here but there are two kinds of guys turned on by this—those who admit the thrill, and liars.

Read: Hotwife 101: What Is the Hotwife Lifestyle?

The sperm competition theory is a popular biological explanation for this phenomenon.

Numerous studies on humans, primates and other test subjects show that arousal and testosterone are ramped up naturally when other males start circling a male’s object of sexual interest. Biologists acknowledge that primate communities are in competition for a female and the presence of another male amplifies her desirability and arousal.

Males literally make more sperm when other men are in the game. You’ll hear this called “sperm competition.” It is the reason for both increased sexual arousal and increased fighting among males at bars, etc. Understanding the biological reality around this is enough for many to acknowledge how natural the idea and the arousal are.

For many men, too, the idea or reality of a woman who wants, loves, and needs so much sex that she needs more is hot stuff. Having a wife who is so horny that she wants more more more is very exciting.

Read: Hotwife Seeking Bull? Where to Find Him

At the center of that thrill, for many guys, is the jealousy and humiliation that go alongside the erotic excitement. A powerful, horny female and the erotic humiliation are blended together.

Erotic humiliation is a big turn on in BDSM and for lots of guys, this is how it manifests. This goes back to the biology as well as to psychology, and for many dudes, it is both.

Cuckold Relationships

Fantasy and Role Play Only

Cuckolding is a common fantasy and like other fantasies, it can be enjoyed on its own terms without realizing it in actuality. For some, the fantasy is exciting but there is no interest in exploring it in real life.

We have lots of fantasies that we prefer to enjoy in our minds. Monogamous couples can enjoy cuckolding this way as well. Role play can bring cuckolding to life through make believe.

Read: 8 Benefits of Role Play for Poly Lovers

Cuckolding Lifestyle

Others want to live the cuckolding kink and enjoy a female-led relationship where she sleeps with other men and all lovers involved derive pleasure from the power exchange.

4 Types of Cuckolds

1. The Waiting Cuckold

This cuckold waits for his wife while he knows she is seducing a bull or fucking him. The anticipation and unknown heighten the erotic power for him.

2. The Voyeur Cuckold

The voyeur cuckold is the cuckold who likes to watch his wife have sex with another man.

3. The Submissive Cuckold

The submissive cuckold is the sub in a dominant-submissive power exchange relationship, where cuckolding is one of the ways that she wields her dominance. He does what she says and does it on her terms. She does what she wants.

4. The Chastity Cuckold

The chastity kink meets the cuckolding kink for a double thrill of erotic humiliation. Not only is the submissive male chaste—forbidden to masturbate, and denied sex—but his cuckoldress is busy giving sexual access to other men.

Many play with chastity devices and other forms of bondage and restraint, or use psychological directives, denial, and other manifestations of BDSM.

Read: How to Meet Cuckold Couples

Are you in a cuck or seeking a cuckold relationship? Please share!

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