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4 Ways to Improve Your Online Dating Success

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Have you been on a dating site for a while but wondering why you’re having little success? By success, I mean finding what you are looking for, whether that be casual sex, a kinky friend with benefits, or something more serious. If you’re brand new to online dating, I will say, it takes a little experience to get the hang of things. But if you’ve been trying to meet poly couples or singles and feel frustrated, I think these tips will help.

1. Write a kick-ass profile. This one may seem obvious but after years of online dating, I can confirm that a great profile is a rarity. Writing a stand-out profile includes filling out all the sections, saying what makes you uniquely you, and stating exactly what you’re looking for. Consider your profile to be the foundation of dating success. Hard work does pay off… remember what happened to the first two brothers in The Three Little Pigs?

2. Choose the right photos. No pictures = no replies (yes, people do join sites and send messages without a single photo!) Post a minimum of four photos, showing different sides of your personality and lifestyle. Avoid using all vacation photos (We get it! You like to travel), photos with an ex (or someone who might be perceived as an ex), and ones that don’t have a clear shot of your face (beauty is in the eye of the beholder!)

3. Send a thoughtful first message. Once you’ve got a profile and the awesome pics to back you up, you can confidently contact those who peak your interest. Remember to read their entire profile, so that you can include something personal in your message. Sadly, about eighty percent of the messages most women receive are of the “Hey, how’s it going?” variety. These lazy messages go straight to the trash. Writing a short, but thoughtful message is an easy way to stand out from the online crowd!

4. Build your dating confidence. Don’t be afraid to date more than one person at a time. Putting all your hopes into one date at a time can be crushing, especially if you’re prone to building expectations or creating fantasy worlds (no, you’re not the only one!) The more dates you go on, the more relaxed you will be. Also, it helps to reflect on what did and didn’t work after each date.

In the meantime… enjoy your world outside of dating. Those with a life full of passions and pursuits are very attractive!

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