Polyamory Advice

6 Tips for Dating a Bisexual Woman

Loving Couple in Bed

What could possibly be sexier than dating a bisexual woman?

Are you are the lucky guy who is going out with a bisexual woman, or the hopeful guy who plans to? Here are some tips for dating a bisexual woman.

6 Tips for Dating a Bisexual Woman

1. Understand What “Bisexual” Means to Her

When you’re dating a bisexual woman, it’s a good idea to find out what bisexual means to her.

For you, it may mean titillating possibilities for threesome love, or hot lesbian fantasies when you’re in bed together.

But her bisexuality has little to do with you. She was bisexual before she met you, and will be bisexual after. Her bisexuality is not all about your fantasies.

There are as many kinds of bisexuality as there are bisexual women. Find out what it means for her.

Some women want to date men and women at the same time. Some bisexual women want to date a male and female couple to form a throuple. Some prefer to focus on their partner, and feel bisexuality means flexibility, but they aren’t unfulfilled when in relationship with one gender. Others prefer to date women and have sex with guys, and some date men but have sex with women.

And some women are bisexual by someone else’s definition—I have a friend who has sex with men and women equally as often, but doesn’t call herself bisexual at all.

Find out how she defines it, and how it will affect your relationship, if at all, before you make assumptions.

Read: Where to Meet Bisexual Women Online

2. Bisexual Doesn’t Mean She Is Polyamorous

If you’re dating a bisexual woman, you might make the mistake of assuming she always wants to date several people at once in order to fulfill her attractions.

But bisexual people are no more or less likely to be polyamorous than other people.

While some bisexual women feel a sexual need to pursue relationships with both men and women at the same time, others focus on monogamy with the person they’re involved with.

Just because you’re attracted to someone doesn’t mean you have to or want to sleep with them, and the same is true for bisexual women.

Of course, since you’re reading this, you may well have met her through poly dating sites or in the polyamorous community. So the likelihood of her being polyamorous is higher.

Read: Guide to Polyamory Dating Sites

3. Dating a Poly Bi Woman Doesn’t always Involve Threesomes

There are lots of different kinds of polyamorous relationships, and just because she is bisexual doesn’t mean she’s willing to share her girlfriends with you. Lots of poly people only have sex with one person at a time, and aren’t interested in threesomes.

Trust me, I totally get the thrill of the thought for you and your hope that this gorgeous bisexual woman will knock on your door with her twin sister or bestie ready to strip naked. But expecting that just because she’s bi is a direct route to never having a threesome.

Read: Why She Doesn’t Want a Threesome

4. Stop Thinking or Acting as if She’s Confused

Don’t try to change her mind or sort it out for her.

Since you’re an open-minded guy, you are probably not the one who needs this tip for dating a bisexual woman. But some guys feel threatened by their lover’s expansive and fluid sexuality and fear she may reject him because he doesn’t have breasts.

It’s natural for inexperienced guys or men dating a bisexual woman for the first time to fear that she’ll switch teams. Being bisexual means she’s attracted to both men and women.

She may decide to date one or the other exclusively. She may decide to break up with you and date someone else. But what’s very unlikely is that she will decide she’s either gay or straight and that she’s been wrong all this time.

Read: Ways to Explore Your Bisexual Side

5. Embrace Her Bisexual Identity Fully

Don’t try to hide the fact that she’s bisexual or downplay it. Enjoy her fully as a bisexual woman, however she chooses to define it.

On the other hand, don’t overplay it either. Guys who introduce me to their friends as “my bisexual lover” don’t usually get a callback.

Best to follow her lead. Don’t out her to her office mates, and don’t hide her from your traditional relatives. See how she presents herself. Don’t ask her to hide her pride t-shirts or activist activities from your family. And don’t ask her to do those things if she’s not political.

In other words, accept her as she is!

Read: How to Offer Support in Relationships

6. Play Your Cards Right, and You’ll Have the Sex of Your Life

If a bisexual woman doesn’t feel pressured to put on a show or have a threesome every night, you may get luckier than you’ve ever dreamed.

When I feel comfortable and not pushed by a guy I’m dating, when he’s not begging for bi fantasy stories but supports my full self, I can get very generous.

I love to hear HIS fantasies and stories, and I love to watch porn with beautiful babes, and I love to share my adventures while I’m making love to him. That’s because I’m equally turned on by male and female bodies, and enjoy touching or just picturing all the ways they tangle together.

The best way to get here is to talk frankly about your sex life, polyamory, boundaries, and fantasies. Without wheedling and whining, you can tell her it turns you on to think about her and you want her to feel comfortable expressing her bisexual side with you. That might be all it takes!

Read: Threesome Dating Sites for Couples

Are you already dating a bisexual woman? Share your advice in the comments.

Tell us what you think!

guest
0 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Polyamory Today logo
Polyamory Today is your source for everything related to polyamory dating and poly relationships. We post tips and advice for polyamorous lovers, open relationships, and those seeking threesomes and group adventures. Enter the world of polyamory with exclusive articles, polls, site reviews, reader stories and more.

Polyamory Magazine
Join over 4,600 polyamorous people who receive Polyamory Today updates every two weeks.




Let's connect.

We share all of our polyamory advice, ideas, and articles on Facebook and Twitter. Follow along on your favorite network to get latest from Polyamory Today Magazine.

Polyamory Today on Facebook Polyamory Today on Twitter