Do you sometimes think of doing something REALLY different in the bedroom? Are you worried that you might shock your significant other with the level of kinky sex you’ve imagined?
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you having kinky sex ideas, and nothing wrong with them having a positive or negative reaction to your suggestion or request to make sex more spicy.
You and your partner can easily get into a comfortable complacent groove, and when that happens, there are a few directions things generally go.
Partners may cheat, settle, or stay in the relationship and let things remain boring. A partner may join in reluctantly… or say, “Let’s try it!” That’s the best scenario you can wish for with kinky sex requests!
Read: Can BDSM Save Your Relationship?
This is the appoach I like to take for kinky sex suggestions: If they say “no,” it’s cool, and if they say “yes,” it’s cool!
Accept whatever answer you get from one partner, and if you are polyamorous like me, then you can always make the same kinky sex request of another partner—no big deal. No need to yuck another person’s yum, as they say.
You don’t need all your kinks to connect to have a kinky sex experience together! All you need to align on is the kinky-sex fun you are choosing to share in that one moment.
Read: Kinky Sex: 10 Surprising Benefits
7 Kinky Sex Ideas
Here are some ideas for deliciously kinky things you can do together.
1. Experiment with Sensation Play
The 101 of sensation play is the blindfold which is a fun and simple jumping off point. The anticipation your lover will have of not knowing what types of sensations they are about to feel will heighten their overall arousal.
You can focus on tactile sensations using vampire (spiked) gloves, and then switch it up with tickles from a feather boa or silk scarf. Add in temperature play, with ice cubes or hot wax.
Sensation play can escalate quickly if you add whips, floggers, canes, paddles, and other impact objects to the mix.
Read: Sensation Play Ideas for Kinky Couples
2. Roleplay Your Fantasies
You can take roleplaying to the farthest reaches of your kinky imagination.
Roleplaying is a great way for couples to explore their kinks and feel somewhat removed because they are in character. It’s not really “you” cuckolding, denying an orgasm, spanking, crossdressing, engaging in power exchange dynamics.
Taking on a role is also a great way to explore your dominant and submissive sides.
However far you go, it’s important to know when the scene begins and ends.
Read: Benefits of Roleplay for Couples
3. Experiment with Footjobs
This is something that’s both kinky and easy to do. Use your feet like a vulva or even like a dildo! I’ve seen both and participated in a variety of footjob fun adventures.
Footjobs provide sensations like no other! Our feet are so neglected, and there’s a variety of activities you can explore with the feet—feet-fucking, toe penetration, foot-to-balls tickling and pinching, toes-to-nipples stimulation.
If one of you already has a foot fetish, this type of kinky sex will be a real treat.
Read: How to Give a Footjob Step by Step
4. Have a Threesome
A threesome can triple the kinky sex ideas coming in. And if you are all open and adventurous, it could be more than a one-off threesome.
Many kinky couples find the perfect third for regular threesome interactions. This type of relationship builds the trust needed for specific types of kink and BDSM practices.
There’s no need to push every boundary possible in a threesome, but it can double your chance of having extra kinks played out.
A threesome means six hands, three mouths, three tongues, three sets of genitals, three assholes… obviously not all of these will be part of every threesome, but the POSSIBILITY is there!
Read: Best Threesome Dating Sites for Couples
5. Try Spanking
Orgasm chasing can be overrated. The journey of a scene with spanking can be an entire experience in delight and denial and delicious devious kinky fun.
Spanking can last longer than a sex scene for some folks, but conversely, the joy that might be found in a kink scene might take one deep into subspace or domspace much faster than it takes to orgasm.
Pain is easier to provide than the pressure to climax in many bodies. Not that there is a judgement either way, but spanking can get some people off easier than many typical sexual activities. Even if it doesn’t ring all the bells, it’s still a fun option!
Read: Spanking Tips for Kinky Couples
6. Peg or Be Pegged
For all the male-identified folks out there: Try a little something up your ass! Just use a lot of lube and take your time doing it, so you don’t hurt yourself or your lover.
There’s no need for anyone to chase any pornographic records or get all greedy with a 12-inch strap-on, nah. Just use a pinky finger with a condom and lube for your first anal experience if you need.
Take it slow to work up to a full-on pegging experience with harness and strap-on. Your booty ain’t going nowhere!
Also, find the P-spot up in there if you are male-identified, and have the courage to reach the top of orgasmic bliss!
Read: How to Prepare for Pegging
7. Explore Tantra
This kinky sexual exchange is top shelf, and it requires something more than just bodily abandon and an open mind. It requires spiritual discipline and intellectual exploration, at the very least.
To properly explore tantra, it takes some reading, practicing, and real concentration with your partner to share the power and beauty inherent in its sexual practices.
The goal of tantra is NOT orgasm but pleasure, balance, breathing, bliss, beauty, and peace. Practices can be kinky, but kink is not just whips and chains either.
Kink is a level of deep sexual exchange with another person, and that can manifest in ALL kinds of experiences. Don’t limit yourself to only a few definitions of kinky sex, please and thank you. I also command you to keep an open mind.
Read: 6 Myths About BDSM and Kink
Sincerely,
Addi “Malcolm Lovejoy” Stewart
Tell us what you think