Polyamory is really the perfect thing for long distance relationships. In monogamy, many relationships fail if one person has to travel for a long period of time, or even move to a different city for work, school or family obligations. This is because, first, humans are sexual beings. “The eye wanders. It’s only natural,” says Quentin, media manager at Poly Dating. “People are becoming more okay with that, and that’s why our member base has grown significantly over the past year.” Second, after a time, a person will just come to desire companionship, whether it’s in the form of a deep relationship or a casual fling. No one wants to be alone.
Polyamory gives those in difficult long distance relationships the opportunity to get their needs met while still retaining a connection with their partner in a far off land. In the monogamy scenario, the relationship wouldn’t last too long, and both partners would prematurely break things off due to cheating or loneliness. However, with poly, the relationship can last until it feels natural for things to end, should that point occur.
This aspect also ensures the flip side of the equation, that the partner who is leaving is able to get what they need from life. They are able to move to further their education, take that awesome job, or just have an adventure, without the fear of losing their partner to the sad abyss of breakups. Of course, it’s still difficult when a partner moves away, but it’s more bittersweet when you can be happy for them and realize they are getting something positive.
That’s the great thing about polyamory. It lets beginnings and endings be whatever they want to be. Ellen, a poly expert at PolyDating.com told us her own story. “I moved to New York because I had lived in California all my life and wanted some adventure. I was sad to leave everything and everyone, especially my boyfriend whom I adore, but I knew that I wanted to have new life experiences. Now that I’ve lived here for a few years, my boyfriend has stopped visiting every couple of months, and our relationship is fading away, but I had his support and love while I was making the transition and meeting new people here.”