Tips & Advice

What to Know about Sex with Transgender Women

Affectionate Couple in Bed

You’ve been chatting with a cute T-girl online, and you know you want to get naked with her. Maybe you’re a trans admirer, or you’re open minded, or you’re good, giving, and game.

Maybe you just love women in general and aren’t into excluding anyone. Even so, you might be shy or uncertain about how to proceed because you aren’t familiar with her body or how it works.

Here’s what you need to know.

What to Know about Transgender Sex

Transgender women aren’t all that different.

You might be surprised to know that trans women are more familiar than you think.

Her breasts may or may not be implants. Hormones cause breast growth, but she may have chosen to enlarge them. Either way, it’s the same as with other women.

If she’s rocking a designer vagina, it will be very much like a cis vagina. You will need lube, but otherwise it acts like any other pussy.

If she has a penis, it will act more like a pussy than you think. But we’ll get to that.

All women are different.

Even though she is like other women in many ways, you already know that every woman is different from one another.

What feels good to your girlfriend may leave your wife cold. What feels good on one day of the month is painful on another.

Not only are women different from each other, but they are different from themselves, constantly. We are a mystery, yes. And it’s beautiful.

Because every woman is different sexually, getting to know her body and needs is new with each partner. So no need to worry that you won’t “know what to do.” It’s a process of discovery.

Listen to the expert.

The one who knows best about how her body operates is, of course, the woman herself. She won’t have the same responses, desires, or equipment as another woman, or as another trans woman—go to the source for expertise on her unique body.

Don’t be embarrassed or nervous about talking to her about sex. If you’re worried about coming across like an ignoramus, it’s best to avoid questions like “Do you still have a cock?” But an open, honest approach will work wonders. “I want to make sure you’re comfortable and feel good, but I’m not sure how to make that happen. Will you show me?” is a much better approach.

The nitty gritty about women’s penises.

You may see some politically incorrect porn featuring huge hung stallions with breasts and lipstick. This is kinky and hot for many of us, but doesn’t accurately depict most transgender women’s sexuality.

If she does have a penis, it is more than likely not going to operate the way yours does. She may not feel feminine using it that way, and even more likely, that is simply not how it works.

Hormones make her penis smaller and softer. Think of her penis as a vulva. It might feel good to touch, lick, and stroke it, but it probably won’t respond the way you expect a cock to—because it’s a woman’s penis.

Which leads us to…

Don’t use fetish language like “girl dick,” unless she wants you to.

Trans women are overly fetishized and objectified, using words like “tranny” and “shemale” and “girl dick.” Some trans women embrace these terms, but most don’t. The rule of thumb is that she can call her body anything she wants, but you should refer to her the way she wants you to.

Ready to meet local trans women but not sure where to start? See  4 Ways to Meet Transgender Women over at I Love TS Magazine.

Are you in a relationship with a trans woman? What advice can you share?

Tell us what you think!

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