You can’t beat the excitement of a new relationship. But we all know the honeymoon phase only lasts so long. You get comfortable with your partner, you stop having sex as much, and it gets difficult to keep that motor running. So how do you recharge the batteries in a relationship that feels stale? It takes a little imagination and effort, on both sides, to bring a ho-hum relationship back to life. Here’s some ideas to help you get started.
Go Back in Time
Remember what it was like when you met your partner. What kind of dates did you go on? Were you having sex on park benches? Surprise your partner with a recreation of one of those magic first encounters. Women love remembering special moments that you’ve shared.
Thinking of You
Make small gestures that let her know you’re thinking about her even when she’s not with you. This can be a sexy text message, an email of a cute animal with a caption, or a sweet phone message.
I’m not talking about sex, that’s okay too, but if you’re not getting any then this is a good place to start. A big part of intimacy is human touch. This includes holding hands, playing with her hair, hugging, rubbing her feet, or a sexy massage. Casual contact during the day can lead to full-on contact at night.
Partners often stop dating once they officially become a couple. I see it happen super early in relationships and it’s a romance killer. Ask your girl on a date, even if you’ve been together for five years. Pretend she’s someone you barely know, a woman you’re trying to impress. Spend extra time on your appearance. Put some thought into your date. Go beyond the dinner at the local steakhouse and movie night. Creativity impresses women.
You don’t have to be Shakespeare to write a sweet note for your lady. It can be something as basic as, “You’re so beautiful” on a sticky note that you leave on the bathroom mirror or a silly poem you place in her coat pocket. This mix of romance and surprise can’t be beat. And it’s something a woman will be able to keep and reread to remind her how you feel.
Men often give up complimenting once a relationship has been established. Big mistake! A woman wants to feel her worth and will feel like you’re taking her for granted if you don’t show signs of appreciation. Comment on the way she looks but also on what she does well, whether this is at home or at her work.
If two ships passing in the night describes your relationship then you have to make time for each other. Sign up for a class or activity together. Not only will you be learning something new, but you’ll also have a set time when you know you’ll be spending time together. Try something fun and physical such as skating, dancing, or joining a local sports league.
Talk and Listen
It’s true, women love to talk and men often tune out which is taken as a slap in the face. Being a good listener is a message to her that you care about what she thinks and feels. When a woman feels like she’s being ignored she gets angry. Just so you know, an angry woman never wants to have sex. Your partner doesn’t always want advice or your opinion, she just wants a sounding board. An easy task that comes with great reward.
How do you keep the fires burning in a long term relationship?