How defined are your boundaries?
I saw an advertisement that I’ll never forget. It said “Imagine how strong you would be if you had nothing to hide.” And it impacted my head insanely. Especially considering I’m a nudist and a porn star, ha ha! But seriously, it was brilliant.
What is the science and psychology behind that? Are we ashamed of the power of our beauty and the energy in our bodies? Why do we wear the masks we wear, and wear the costumes and clothes that conceal our truth and the essence of our true self? It’s not a logical way to behave, but it’s something that society psychologically reinforces in everyone, and thus the game goes.
But, it’s a good thing to check from time to time to determine where your edges are, and what your revelations look like.
10 Questions to Ask Your Poly Self
1. Who will you tell that you’re polyamorous? Family, friends, acquaintances, and/or strangers? Everyone?
2. When do you reveal the reality of your romantic realm? First day, third day, fifth day… or first month? Never?
3. How do you share your polyamorous truth? Do you say it in a one-sided, one-sentence monologue? A conversation? A text?
4. Do you limit how many partners you tell people about? Are there some people who you don’t share your truth with? Or all of them?
5. Do you talk about the sexuality you share with your partners? What is private and what is public potential information?
6. Do you write about your polyamory on social media? Do you tell your Facebook friends about your unique scenarios?
7. Are there any secrets you refuse to share with your poly partners? How long have you had these secrets and why?
8. Do you have a FetLife account, and do you show your face on it? How much have you embraced your deep sexual identity?
9. Do you have levels of your sexuality that you don’t reveal? Do your parents know you’re poly AND gay or lesbian or queer or into BDSM?
10. Are you hiding any sexual desires from your SELF that you are not confessing to your heart and soul? You can admit it…
This is a good thing to do from time to time: just see how much of yourself you are seeing. We are always obscuring, hiding, teasing, hinting, and not exposing ALL of our selves in every moment in life. Very few people live out loud and live to the fullest. They have their reasons and it’s good and all, but the truth is, hiding love from life is like hiding light from earth. No good!
Determine your boundaries, and then stretch them wider when you are ready to spread your wings and fly higher into freedom!
With well-defined Love,