It’s that time of year again already, when we reflect on our lives and make New Year’s resolutions to change things starting January 1.
Most people make resolutions about money, health, and relationships. Here, some polyamorous folks share their relationship resolutions.
“I love both of my families, but I so often feel I’m spreading myself thin between them and my job. I want to prioritize family time and time with my wives, and that might mean cutting out some overtime.” – Jake, 28
“I resolve to accept and work through jealousy. I’m poly for purely selfish reasons—I can’t limit myself to one partner when I enjoy variety so much. This means of course that my partners are free too, and after twenty years in open relationships, I still get jealous! This year I’m going to find ways to come to terms with that and stop letting the green monster destroy my relationships.” – Kevin, 47
“More sex! Like many people in long-term relationships, our triad has put sex on the back burner and found ourselves less interested than at first. This is normal and less sex always happens after some time, but we all believe sex is better and more meaningful when shared with people you know intimately, so we should make an effort to connect in bed more often. My resolution is to find more time for sex and to bring variety into our bedroom.” – Brian, 34
“My relationship resolution this year—both of us, actually, my wife and I—is to tell our families we are both poly and both bisexual. We’re tired of hiding or explaining things away. We’ve been together for four years and figured it was no one’s business what we do in our bedroom, or in anyone else’s, but we’ve mutually agreed that our convictions are important and when we get married this spring, we want to be ‘out’ so that we can celebrate without secrecy.” – Javier, 26
“My polyamorous resolution this year is to take inventory of what I’m doing and with whom, and decide what and who is most important to me. I’ve been reluctant to make commitments to anyone, but as I grow, I’m learning that the poly life isn’t really about being alone and having many lovers.
The community has taught me that it’s about being MORE connected, and MORE committed. I’m ready for that now, for something more. I’m going to think carefully about what situations I might fit into on a longer term basis. I’m excited about making these changes!” – Marlo, 29
“I resolve to be more open minded. I’m pretty selfish in bed when it comes to what I want, which is lots of women, and lots of girl-on-girl action in front of me while I stroke my dick. It’s my favorite thing, and it’s why I entered into a poly relationship—for all this pussy.
My wife loves licking pussy but she also would like to get penetrated by a different cock from time to time. Since our commitment is that we only sleep with other people together, you can see it’s not very fair that I have never said yes to bringing a man into our bedroom. I want to please her and be generous, so this year I resolve to man up and get over my inhibitions.” – Gregory, 35
What poly resolutions are you willing to share? Let us know in the comments!