Close-ups with Your Long-Distance Lover

There are few things in polyamory more challenging than a long-distance relationship. It’s really hard to do, even for the best of people. Can one stay faithful with just a Skype connection? Is sexy phone talk enough to sustain some people’s sex lives? Are nude selfies and all them digital soft-porn apps and outlets enough to keep the flame burning?

I took a leap into the void of hope when I embarked on a long-distance relationship with a woman I’d been talking to online for a year. I now know the next level of love, friendship, connection, and all kinds of other deep emotion. WOW.

We have been talking for a year online, me and this anonymous angel I met on Twitter. She was super gorgeous, voluptuous, smart, funny, and sexy. We hit it off right away, obvi, but she lived in another country. Still, I needed to learn and grow, and why not do so with a supermodel genius?

I had to learn how it would be if I was patient and non-physical with someone who I had a deep passion for. We both spoke about other lovers in our lives, so that helped the feelings of wanting to touch flesh and the desire for closeness. We showed nude truths together and got naked on camera a few times, which really helped with bonding, but nothing would be like meeting up.

By the miracles of modern reality I actually saw her in person last weekend! She came here, that wonderful woman. She trusted me, which I did everything in my power to make sure she would, and she took the very long journey to come see me for three days of whatever was meant to be! I was honored.

It was a huge risk for a woman to do so, and I really loved her for trusting me to come this far, even though she’s never met me. I cleared my calendar the best I could to give her all my time, attention, care and love. It was mostly great, mostly fun, with lots of sexy exploration, intimacy, conversation, insight, and even a hardcore disagreement that came from out of nowhere.

I was educated on the risks of spending time with a technical stranger, even though there was a polyamorous foundation in place. I don’t want to ruin our privacy, so I’ll stop there, and say that we ended off by eating ice-cream waffles with strawberries and bananas and melted chocolate before she went back home.

Our connection was strong, pure, and deeper than we both expected it could be on our first meeting. And we did make love, so I was lucky! I can do the long-distance relationship a bit better than I thought, but it’s still not easy.

We decided to not hold the same expectations that we might if we lived in the same city, but we continue to stay in touch and keep our hearts open to the future… it feels right. And the long distance doesn’t feel so long or distant anymore.

Addi Stewart

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