What Women are Looking for in Casual Relationships

What do women look for in a man when they’re looking for casual sex? Big biceps? A nice cock? Smooth chest or hairy? A six-pack?

You may be surprised to find out that your looks and body are actually low on our ratings list.

My friend Jenna is too busy at med school for a serious relationship, but she loves sex, so she looks for no-strings-attached hookups.

“I actually don’t care whether a man is ripped from the gym or soft around the middle, whether he’s bald or has a full head of hair. All kinds of looks and bodies are wonderful to experience, giving and receiving pleasure. It’s best that men pay attention to the rest of their traits, because that’s what’s most important.”

What Women Look for in Casual Encounters

Sense of Humor

Every woman has “sense of humor” on her list of what she looks for in a man, whether she’s in the market for casual sex or lasting love. What gives? Are you funny enough?

Don’t develop a complex if you aren’t a natural comedian. It’s not all about telling jokes, but about being easy and fun to be around. Don’t take everything so seriously, and lighten up. We want to be comfortable around a man, and know he can laugh at his mistakes—and ours.

Conversational Skills

You probably aren’t planning on having lengthy conversations about the meaning of life with a hookup partner, but stimulating dialogue can very arousing. It might just be chatter in the car when you pick her up, or on the phone to make plans about where to get naked, but don’t clam up when you finally get face to face.

Respect for Her Boundaries

The more a man is willing to comply with a woman’s rules, the more she’s willing to break them.

Even if she’s fully planning to spend the night sitting on your face or being banged against the brick wall of your garage, if you act like you expect it she won’t want it.

She needs to feel you are willing to respect the changes in her mood, desire, or expectation. That certainty means she feels safe and comfortable and that she can get wild.

Confidence without Arrogance

Me, Jenna, and every other girl I know would much rather straddle and ride an average dude who is funny and humble than a Chippendales specimen who is full of himself.

It’s a total turn off if you’re more into your mirror than into me.

Chemistry and Attraction

It’s not first because chemistry is dependent on the other four traits and abilities I mentioned.

Chemistry can also mean stuff like a hairy chest, dark brown eyes, or whether we prefer a beard or clean shaven. We might have a thing for Italian guys, or athletes, or tech nerds. We might like a man in a suit or a man in kicks and a hoodie.

As important as those preferences are to chemistry, chemistry can override them and attract a woman to a different “type” than she usually goes for. And chemistry is not guaranteed just because you are her type!

Chemistry is dependent on your personality and outlook, on how you treat her and other women, on whether you are self-absorbed, and how much you enjoy life.

If you want to attract women for casual encounters, stay positive and fun to be around—we’ll be knocking down your door.

Tell us what you think

Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments