Tips & Advice

4 Essential Strap-On Tips for Beginners

Dominant Woman in Stockings

When Gord’s wife brought up the idea of getting a strap-on dildo for their one-on-one and group-sex play sessions, he was understandably turned on. He was intimidated too, also understandably.

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Like any new toy or idea, the strap-on can take some getting used to and figuring out.

I can’t think of any homework more fun than this, though, so keep a playful mindset and work your way through these tips for beginners. You and your ladies will be experts in no time!

Find the right harness.

You want a harness that fits her properly. Strap-on dildo harnesses come in all shapes and sizes, so if she’s extra petite, get one that adjusts snugly to her form. If she’s extra large, find one made for plus-sized women, so that she doesn’t feel strangled.

Skip the flimsy strappy strap on harnesses in the beginning (or probably altogether) and get something sturdy. It takes a surprising amount of support to control the dildo and if the weight of it is always breaking the strap or not following her body movements, there isn’t much point.

Find the right dildo.

You can experiment and interchange sizes, colors, and textures of dildo anytime, but get things started with something comfortable for her—and you.

If she’s going to use the strap-on dildo with a female partner, obviously that lover’s input would be ideal. In most cases, a standard size and shape cock is perfect.

If you’re getting pegged, the dildo that goes with the harness depends on whether you are experienced at this or not. Use something similar to the dildo size and style you’ve already enjoyed getting fucked with. If you’re new to anal penetration, I suggest a smaller dildo, or even a butt plug.

Get used to anal penetration.

Elaborating on the second tip, it makes sense to get used to butt play before taking a ten-inch dick up your ass. If you have been fucked with dildos or regularly take a butt plug or finger up your ass, you’re fine or on your way.

If your ass is pretty virginal, get used to feeling something inside of it. You need to relax, and you need lots of lube.

Use your imagination.

There are many ways to play with a strap-on, and if you’re poly it’s pretty much unlimited. You might begin exploring because your wife wants to get fucked by your girlfriend. Maybe you wanted to watch that, and that’s how things started. Now they both want to fuck your asshole!

You can use a strap-on dildo in dominance and submission games. You can use it for sissy-boy humiliation kinks. You can enjoy the show if one of your partners is an exhibitionist. Your female partners can give it to each other from behind. You can have a daisy chain when having a threesome or moresome.

You can all get into role play that includes gender bending. Maybe your girlfriend wants to pretend she’s a man and dress up like one for the day. Just knowing she’s wearing a cock near her pussy will keep your dick hard until you’re ready to take it in your ass.

Another way to play with a strap-on that can be really hot is for you to wear it. You might want to experiment with having more than you were given, or let your girlfriend experience an outrageously large cock. You might want to keep fucking during a group scene while your real dick is refuelling. You might want to try fucking your wife’s male lover without using your actual cock.

For all these and more, the strap-on is your friend!

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