Poly Relationships

Diversity in Polyamory

Polyamory Couple with Third

The Polyamory Population: Polypulation!

I have to just state the bare facts: polyamory is a phenomenal world to grow one’s soul with and love one’s lovers inside of. Since declaring myself poly, I have been a member of a world of amazing and unpredictably divine experiences, and I cannot attribute these memories to anything except the magic of polyamorous passionate action! To the wacky, wild, and wonderful world of poly people, I eternally and absolutely salute your spirits!

One thing I’d like to note that polyamory has taught me: ACCEPTANCE OF DIVERSITY.

If one horrific aspect of monogamy exists, it might be this: the exclusion of ALL other people and sexual possibilities because of the thought they don’t exist on one’s experiential radar or in their area of desire. It actually extends and expands far beyond sexual orientation, sadly. Many monogamous people have fallen victim to the “list mentality”, where they ONLY seek partners that fit their narrow criteria for commitment and connection. A woman has to have breasts this big or small, an ass this shape, hair a certain color, be from this social circle, she has to be from only these cultures, can’t be too fat or too thin, can’t be this, can’t be that… etc. Or a man has to have this job and this economic status, be this old, have this car, have that style, show that social status, and have this much hair, and be this many inches with his dicksize, AND be taller than she is, or else forget even trying to say HELLO! Really doesn’t sound like love or even a long-term happy and stable connection can be made with such strict parameters to bonding with people!

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On the other hand, since polyamory allows for multiple relationships to grow at once, a person doesn’t really have as many reasons to reject friends with or without benefits, polyamorous partners or any other emotional possibilities at all! Things don’t always have to go all the way to sex or all the way to constant commitment. They can stay in the fun exploration stage for as long as people desire to keep their mind and body open to new people, which can happen every day!

Polyamory has given me the chance to interact emotionally, spiritually, intimately, mentally, and philosophically with:

Men now only into men, who were married to women years ago
Men who used to be women
Men who have only been with men, sexually
Men who are virgins and gay, but still choose to have girlfriends
Trans women who were men
Trans men who were women
Trans people in general, instead of never connecting to them anywhere
Women who have only loved women
Women who have only lovely women… and then chose ME to be their first male lover!
Women who love men so much they can never have enough
Women who love sex so much they can never have enough
Women who love life beyond the boundaries set by a conservative, patriarchal society
Women who can’t find peace or joy in the structures of matrimony
Women who can’t find enough love in monogamy
Women who dream to know sex beyond their mother’s and father’s expectations
People who are not scared to have crazy fun!

And honestly, the last monogamous relationship I was in, I definitely LOVED that woman I shared that special year with! But I did not meet very many new people, and I was not given the space to open many new relationships, whether with friends or with other lovers. She and I explored a very far distance between us, but I can’t say that I was given the privileges that polyamory offers. It was not as loving as life could be.

But then I became a polyamorist… and my heart NEVER stopped growing!

And it’s still getting bigger today!

In love,
Addi Stewart

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