Some people know at a young age that they are polyamorous. I have a friend who knew she was poly as a teenager, before polyamory was even a thing. She just knew that the monogamous way of life wasn’t going to fit her needs and desires.
You might know very little about the poly lifestyle, but you may also feel that your relationships to date haven’t been working out for a variety of reasons. The polyamory spectrum offers so many different kinds of relationships to those seeking a different path of exploration, both romantically and sexually.
7 Reasons to Try Polyamory
- You’re just out of a long-term relationship. Whether it’s a divorce or a separation, it’s a good time to play the field and not get yourself into anything too serious right away. You may find being a third to a primary couple is more than enough after being in a committed relationship.
- You’re in a long-term relationship that isn’t working. Many couples who still deeply love each other, but admit to themselves and each other that something needs to change, decide to open up their relationship to great success. There are many things to discuss such as boundaries, veto rules, intimacy, and the kind of relationship you each would like to have, but poly has saved many a problematic relationship, if not made them stronger.
- You want to enjoy a variety of sexual experiences. As long as you are honest with your partners and practice safe sex, you can engage in a wide scope of sexual connections that could include everything from threesomes to fetish play to BDSM.
- You want to have multiple partners. If you found yourself cheating or even just longing for something your previous partner couldn’t provide, you may want to have several partners, or one primary and a secondary. Not all polyamory peeps are into group sex encounters, but many are more sexually adventurous than mono people.
- You can imagine loving more than one person. Maybe you have already experienced this in the past but never acted on it because you didn’t think it was right, or even possible. While it’s not what the status quo promotes, it is possible and fulfilling for polycentric folks.
- You possess excellent communication and time-management skills. If some of the previous reasons apply, as well as these, then you may find polyamory to be a good fit. If you’ve struggled talking about your feelings with just one partner, maybe not so much. My poly friend has weekly Skype meetings with her partner, his partner, and his partner’s partner… if just the thought of this kind of communication stresses you out, you may struggle with polyamory (not to say all couples, triads and more, have this type of relationship, but being able to discuss emotional needs and desires readily is very important.)
Why did you try polyamory? Please share your story in the comments!