Build a Stronger Relationship through Conflict

I had a milestone with an angel yesterday! We just reached our six-month anniversary together, and she said to me that it’s been the healthiest relationship of her entire life! Felicitations et hooray!

She is an older soul with younger flesh, and her spirit is truly something beyond my ability to articulate as far as the passion I feel from her every touch, every kiss and every embrace. We haveĀ magnetic chemistry that is electrically delicious! I could go on and on, but I won’t quite… it matters though.

This article is about how, in the span of six virtually perfect polyamorous months together, we have endured exactly TWO dilemmas in our situation. And they were NOT arguments with each other, god no. We are far too evolved and compassionate to each other to actually argue or scream and fight.

We experienced two separate and legitimate personal issues that were imposing and infringing on the evolution of our relationship. And how we dealt with them MADE US STRONGER. BETTER. FASTER. SLEEKER, EVEN! Ha. No, but seriously: problems made us more CONNECTED THAN EVER.

First one was me slipping and slacking because of some personal shit I was going through this summer. My brother had a schizophrenic relapse, work was lagging, and I was not being respected artistically in fields that I was working hard in… and it eventually affected our relationship really deeply. I couldn’t see it though, I was too much in the murk of the haze and the fog of the pain.

She reached out to me, and respectfully asked me to STEP IT UP, or she was going to have to leave me be. She was going through serious stuff too, and I didn’t even know its depth. I really had a wake-up call delivered from her heart, and I was like NO WAY DO I WANT TO LOSE HER IN MY LIFE!

I did what any smart human being would do: I improved myself in every way. She asked for more communication? I gave it to her. She asked for more intimacy? I was happy to give that to her too. She asked for more listening from me in moments of crisis and connection? O-kay! I’m reloaded! Done and done, sweet dove.

The next week… things were BETTER. I felt the improvements immediately. We laughed more. We shared food more. Saw some art. Inspired each other. And I said to myself: this relationship actually improved from having an issue! How about them apples?! I marveled at the power of love and truth.

Funny thing was: shit happened again!

I recently went to go see her, and she said, “I have a confession, and I have an issue!” She told me with her super brave heart and soul shining through her struggles, and I accepted her words with no judgement and pure love.

I thanked her for being so courageous and so real, I’m not even sure I would have been able to be the same level of frank as she was being about what she was revealing. I was not worried even though it was about me, and I was just happy for her to not want to hide her pain or problems from me in any way.

We proposed some solutions, laughed, hugged, and did nothing but celebrate our love, and the many ups and downs we may have together.

I was so happy to be with her after she told me these things, and I said, “Wow, our relationship actually improves from solving conflict.” I also realized it improves by our natural love. This is like a double barrel blast of love, straight to the heart of my dreams in life. I’m so happy with her!

Thanks for living this lesson with me, angel!

Everything is an opportunity to evolve the relationship if people aren’t trying to hold back their truth.

In love,
Addi Stewart

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