A few months back, I wrote a post about handling eparation anxiety in poly relationships. This week I’ve decided to interview my partner, who is currently on vacation with his wife and kids so that he may share his wisdom about travelling and poly relationships.
Q: Travelling takes a lot of preparation, especially when poly relationships are a factor. What are some of the unique things you had to consider when planning your trip?
A: Well, most importantly I had to choose a time that I felt would work for all of us. Because of the holidays, we all had time off from work and school. I knew you were going to spend time with your family, so I felt it would be a good time to go. I also made sure to send you a copy of our itinerary so you would be kept in the loop.
Q: Everybody knows that vacations are often hectic and full of surprises. How do you find the time to handle those things and still have time to maintain communication your relationships?
A: I send a lot of little notes and pictures whenever I get the chance. I tend not to wait until I have a big stretch of time to send messages or call because I know those times might not come. I’m someone who rarely sleeps through the night. Sometimes when I’m up, I’ll sit down and write mushy love notes because that’s when the feelings tend to well up. In terms of maintaining things for me and your metamour, we made sure to plan the trip well so we would have minimal work to do and lots of time to spend together. We also make a point of setting our phones aside during dinner.
Q: There was a period of time on your trip this time around when you and I couldn’t be in touch. How did you cope with that and do you have any advice for people who might suffer from separation anxiety?
A: To be honest, I looked at pictures of you a lot, and wrote blogs of my own on various poly topics. I also made a point of keeping a mental track of where you were on a given day, and how things might be going for you as you were visiting your family.
Q: What do you think is the biggest benefit of travelling with individual partners?
A: Mostly just the chance to tune out the world and focus on each other. It’s also wonderful to make individual memories together and strengthen the relationships.
Q: What would you say is the biggest challenge?
A: Sometimes travelling can create tension because of the intensive time spent together. It can sometimes be a challenge to be patient and listen to what my partners need.
What travelling tips for poly partners can you add? Do you travel with more than one partner at a time?