Facts & Info

How Do We Identify as Poly?

Couple Dancing in Club

This time, I’m dreaming differently. Hold me as we imagine something new. Is there a way to communicate poly? Could we have a secret handshake? I know there’s an official flag, and a few other things that are universally recognized as symbols of the polyamorous community. But you know how gay people used to have bandanas in their back pockets or earrings in the left ear and things of that nature? Subliminal social signals and cues to communicate certain lifestyles that are not acceptable in certain social circles?

Could there be a way we let people know without letting other people know, if that were at all desireable to any of us? And what about media? Are there any polyamorous anthems that you subscribe to singing loud and proud?

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Is there a poly character in a movie that speaks to your heart and soul more than Cinderella speaks to the girl next door? Or is there a book you have read where the protagonist is a polyamorist and everything winds up in an ending possessing untraditional happiness? (If that book exists, please let me know about it! Lordy lord does that have to become popular around my house.)

I wonder these things, because polyamory seems to be almost, kinda, sorta, maybe-actually-borderline becoming acceptable in the mainstream. Not to EVERYONE, but there’s a significant amount of zeitgeist discussion about non-monogamous relationships, and we really are doing things as a society sexually and structurally that we’ve never really done before, not in this manner.

I believe poly is the ORIGINAL way of life with humans (yes, I am a fan of Sex at Dawn), but we… I won’t say lost our way, but got interested in another way… as if there was only one other way, and as any chef will tell you: there’s not only one way to make one meal.

What ways can we advance the idea of polyamory in the world? I would love to invite feedback from you readers, I really would love to know any ideas you have! Because the world is full of possibility these days. There is so much sexual exploration and experimentation and new erotic information for us to examine, explore, express and even learn and unlearn within our own experiences.

Poly is always growing and will keep growing, inside each person that chooses it, as well as in practice in society. But it’s on US to steer the direction of this beautiful love boat.

So, where would you take your polyamory dream if you could take it to any level of life with anyone you love?

Let me know!

Sincerely yours,
Addi Stewart

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