Polyamory Dating

Poly Unicorns: Are they Real?

Unicorn

Is a poly unicorn a mythical beast that attends polyamory festivals? Not quite. Someone recently said to me, “I can’t believe you don’t know what a unicorn is.” After a little internet surfing and interviewing, I’ve become enlightened once again.

What is a Poly Unicorn?
A unicorn in the poly kingdom refers to a bi-female who is interested in dating both partners in a couple. Not so easy to find, hence the elusive mythical title. They do exist, my sources tell me, but they are rare and difficult to find.

Why a Unicorn?
Couples who can answer this will increase their chances of success of finding a bi-woman and making it work. Why do you only want to date as a couple? Are issues of jealousy or insecurity part of your reasoning? A couple should have a solid foundation before uniting with a third, unicorn or otherwise.

Unicorn Questions
Before adding an awesome bi-woman to your primary relationship, consider these questions.

  • Will you date your unicorn separately, developing individual relationships?
  • What if the unicorn’s sexual interest leans towards only one of you?
  • What if your dream unicorn falls in love with someone else while in a triad with you?
  • What if one of you has a falling out with the unicorn but the other is still in love with her?

Finding a Unicorn
If a unicorn is what you and your partner want, how will you find her? Poly dating is hard enough without adding more specifications. It also puts pressure on a woman having to want both primaries. If she was only attracted to one of you, would you let her in?

Most couples use online dating for unicorn hunting. As a woman with a single hetero profile, I get approached regularly by poly couples, but so far, they have given me the option of dating one or both.

My advice to couples, when writing a profile, is to ask for little else except for what defines a poly unicorn. That in itself, is asking a lot. When I see a profile that lists too many must-haves, it’s a turn off. If you desire a woman to be open to engaging romantically or sexually with you both, don’t scare her off with an extended wish list before she even responds.

Any unicorn experiences to share?

Tell us what you think!

guest
2 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Polyamory Today logo
Polyamory Today is your source for everything related to polyamory dating and poly relationships. We post tips and advice for polyamorous lovers, open relationships, and those seeking threesomes and group adventures. Enter the world of polyamory with exclusive articles, polls, site reviews, reader stories and more.

Polyamory Magazine
Join over 4,600 polyamorous people who receive Polyamory Today updates every two weeks.




Let's connect.

We share all of our polyamory advice, ideas, and articles on Facebook and Twitter. Follow along on your favorite network to get latest from Polyamory Today Magazine.

Polyamory Today on Facebook Polyamory Today on Twitter